(voice)

[hexrot]

—This is Jayce Talis. [ that's not going to mean anything, to anyone. this man's voice is rasping, dragging, in between sounded exhausted, heavy and ill. ] I'm a scientist. I researched . . . The Arcane, with my . . . With my partner, Viktor— most of my life.

[ frequent pauses are a must. he almost feels out of breath if he doesn't, and that puffs through the radio, ragged and sluggish. ]

All of us— seem to have a symbol. A rune, on our bodies. If you've been to the Shrine, then I'm sure . . . You have something else, now. Maybe a message. Please, if you could show it to me. I'll be . . . [ another hushed pause, ] Outside the Common Room. There's a truck, with . . . Butterflies, [ the irony in his voice is dry. ] That's— Where I'll be.

If it helps get us anywhere, I . . . Need, to crack it, I . . . [ i promised, he mutters, before swiftly adding, through a strain that's tight in his throat: ] That's all.

(action/flavor)

[ jayce is rebounding hard on his magic sepsis as his first symptom to becoming undead! so he is not visibly well for anyone who wants to come see him, but he is trying deathly hard with the symbols and trying to fight the clock with obsession. the iridescent pick up near one of the camp lights is a mess of papers in the front seats as much as the flatbed behind it, spread out and held in place with pebbles or stones, littered with those very symbols as well as formulas he's trying to link and complete like a map.

it's what keeps him from giving into sleep. ]

Comments

[hexrot]

[ the heads up helps— but even then, jayce's startle has been dulled enough that he does not seem afraid, or even tense. different forms of all kinds exist on runeterra. perhaps what is different here is that he's never seen one turn into something before his eyes. ]

. . . This is an "Atma"?

[bufudine]

[A nod in affirmation. Although he keeps the same calm, even tone, his words are a little more guttural in this form.]

We weren't in control when we first transformed.

[Though while he has control now, it doesn't stop his demon's hunger.]

Same as those outside the shields during the moon warp who lost their minds when they changed.

[hexrot]

[ jayce . . . was outside when that happened. in the radio tower, with viktor— while his partner hadn't lost his mind, his body did suffer a horrific change. jayce's eyes go from observing the demon form to losing focus, gazing ahead without gazing anywhere in particular. ]

Did you?

[bufudine]

[Serph reverts back to his humam form, the process exactly the same as before but in reverse. The hunger is more pressing when cloaked in Varuna's flesh, so it isn't wise to stay in that form for longer than necessary.]

Not this time.

[Maybe because he had done this before. But even he was not immune to the moon's effects on his body, despite his demon delaying them.]

Those I encountered were driven by strong emotion. Anger. Fear.

[Hunger.]

[hexrot]

[ that. makes him recall something else. ]

I didn't feel anything . . . Different. [ nothing beyond what he was already feeling: sick. but that was something else. something he already had that perhaps wasn't taking kindly to being in the wrong universe. he knows serph's answer meant he hadn't completely lost it, but yet begs to be questioned. ] Did you?

[bufudine]

[Hm. The changes here were rather strange compared to when he gained his Atma. Oddly incomplete, ebbing and flowing. There had been feathers on his shoulders, arms and legs, now receded. If there had been some kind of impulse from the creature he was becoming, he had not felt it. But he already has the hunger from his demon so perhaps if there was an impulse, his demon had simply drowned it out. Still, that radio message urging them to travel to Nirvana... the messenger had implored them to remain as human as they could.

Jayce had been outside the shields? Given his lack of noticeably inhuman features, Serph had assumed he had stayed within.]

No.

[But Serph is looking at the other man with renewed scrutiny. He'd looked weary when they first met but now he looks downright haggard.]

Your hunger... is it worse after the moon warp?

[hexrot]

[ jayce would never disclose what happened with him out there. how much his heart shattered was kept in his chest; at least his illness and somber mood was a match made in heaven to mask it all efficiently. he'd only say something at the last minute to serph, he thinks. it's one of the only people he'd trust with his notes, if he had to trust anyone here. for now, he waits. maybe in a few days time. maybe in a few minutes. whatever he was feeling and however this would go.

so he nudges his shoulders up in a sorry excuse of a gesture of uncertainty. ]

I don't think it matters.

[bufudine]

[Serph's expression pulls into a deep frown. There's a feeling he can't quite put a name to here. A feeling that simultaneously fills him with unease yet lights a fire within.

Quietly, but with an edge to his voice that wasn't there before, he asks-]

Why is that?

[hexrot]

Serph, [ the tone is drawn, growled, cracking when he points his emphasis: ] look at me.

[ he sees the truth, now, and maybe he was stupid to think that he could work against the clock. but now it seems unrealistic and tremendously stupid of him to think he could do this. before, love and determination had blinded him with unfaltering hope.

he doesn't seem to have that, anymore; either that, or he's understandably being more realistic the closer it approaches. ]

I'm not making it another week.

[ if he's even doing this anymore— it's for them. to make arcade's shots worth the relief before it becomes unbearable. ]

[bufudine]

[It's true that Jayce looks like a mess, barely a person held together by flesh and sinew. And yet...

Are these the feelings that Lupa had as he felt the hunger press up against him, knowing he didn't have much time left? Making the preparations for his people to be cared for, after he was gone?

...]

What about your promise?

[hexrot]

[ jayce's head immediately ducks— because his eyes are gateways into his soul. he is broken beyond repair. he wishes for death to come, now. the one thing that was keeping him alive, and going— ]

It's gone.

[ and it's catching up to him. if he speaks more, he'll break. i've already failed is lodged in his throat. to busy himself— and to perhaps finish up, because he does not feel well, jayce begins taking every single note that's been splayed across the top of the truck's cargo bed into his shaking hands, and into a pile he can hand over to him. ]

It's the best I could do.

[bufudine]

[What the hell is that supposed to mean? A promise that's gone? There's more he's missing and it's frustrating not understanding, not having the full picture, and it has Serph stretching his wings in irritation before folding them back up.

Seeing the embers of the fire behind Jayce's eyes snuffed out like this... Serph reaches out to grab Jayce by the wrist before he can finish putting away all his notes.]

I died. Then I ended up here.

[His voice is low, quiet.]

Even if your path disappears, we can carve a new one.

[hexrot]

[ jayce hears what he's saying but the melancholic curve of his brows doesn't signal his consideration. does serph know, what it's like— to look into the eyes of a man who has given up? it's hollow, distant and set. thinking about all this again has triggered him to fall apart and show it. he doesn't want to carve a new path. and he certainly doesn't want to believe there is more life after death, because then his pain would just— continue. and where would he show up? back here again? it made no scientific sense, anyway.

he didn't want to live if it was without his other half. it was codependent and awful, but it was his truth. ]

Please, just take these. [ jayce pushes the papers from his hand to serph's chest. he doesn't want to elaborate further and he does not want to discuss the what ifs if he changes his mind. ] I'm tired.

[bufudine]

[Damn.]

...Alright.

[Serph reluctantly takes the papers, expression grim as his wings are tucked in even tighter. He can't reach Jayce like this and he certainly can't make him do anything. But Serph isn't willing to give up on him just yet.

So even if he silently nods and takes his leave without another word, Serph searches the Convoy for tools to make copies of Jayce's notes and drawings. They're nothing like reading Gale's reports but he makes as close a copy as he can while skipping making any attempts to draw people. But he fully intends to return them while the man is still alive.]

[hexrot]

[ and then he didn't 💀 ]