[Audio]

[purplexing]

Hey, it's me again. Donnie. [He feels the need to tag that on as he considers what he wants to talk about here.]

...I know it's not going to get any easier the farther we go. That carnival was... Well. If you know, I doubt you need a reminder. But it's only proof that we don't know what more we'll be coming across, and how badly anything will affect us.

It's bad enough there aren't many warnings for the things that do change us, but it's worse when we don't even realize it. Maybe you remember back in the desert, something was messing with our heads, making us forget things, or think we've lived in this screwed up world all this time.

Leo and I made some notes to ourselves- records, basically, written and recorded. Something to help us remember the truth, who we are if we lose ourselves again. But after the carnival...

...

I don't think it's enough. Not if we won't be able to remember to listen or read those testaments. I know we're pulled from all sorts of places, but I don't think any of us want to forget who we are- we can't forget. So I think it'd be beneficial for all of us if we recorded something about ourselves, something we'd think would help us remember, if the worst case ever happens.

You can write it or say it- I have means to keep both, I'll save it on file too, just in case. But it's something we can have on hand. In case any of us slips...

And even if we can't remember ourselves, at least-

At least other people can. And maybe we can help each other.

[He falls silent for a moment, drawing in a deep breath before he lets it out slowly.]

A-anyway, let me know if you need anything or you can just find me at the Turtle Tank. I'm finishing up a strongbox to keep things in. Maybe we can put it in the main train.

...

Donnie, out.

Comments

action;

[faceguy]

[Well, that was a pretty worrying broadcast.

Leo will make his way to the Turtle Tank, popping in via a portal. He glances around, calling out when he doesn’t see Donnie right away.]

Dee? You here?

[undyingcrow]

Would some jazz help?

[He saw Donatello's other post, but didn't get around to it before this one came up. Comfort... isn't exactly Akechi's strong suit, but there's a lot to this message. Understandably heavy contemplation.]

I do agree that recordkeeping is pivotal. This place is... unpredictable at the best of times. Even if it's not quite the same as memory loss, I have noticed that my demeanor in nekomata form has changed since the circus. I'm still "me," but I feel more... driven to defend purity and innocence in a way I hadn't since I was very small.

If our changes influence our minds and personalities, it's all the more pertinent to record who we are in the moment.

[purplexing]

[The sound of rummaging amongst the salvage crates is the first tip-off even before Donnie replies as he straightens up from behind one of the stacks.]

Right here. Need something?

[He studies the pieces he'd pulled out, tucking them under an arm as he picks through some of the metal from his designated bin.]

[purplexing]

[Donnie laughs a bit.] You and Ren. I think I'll have more than enough jazz than I'd ever cared for.

[He sighs then.]

You've got it exactly. We might not think much of the little changes, but then we can't deny the times where we just completely lose it. So far it seems we've lucked out in it not sticking, but if the moon's stability is questionable, I don't know how much easier things will be.

[faceguy]

[There’s something comforting about seeing Donnie rummaging through crates and holding scraps. Like things are how they’re supposed to be.]

Do I have to need something to check in on my favorite twin?

[He leans against a crate, trying to look nonchalant.]

Just seeing how you’re doing!

[purplexing]

[Donnie just eyes him suspiciously at that.]

Your only twin, you mean.

[He goes back to picking out parts.]

I'm fine. Busy. Just how I like to be.

[And not at all his escape from overthinking things, no not at all. To be fair he has built up a fresh list of projects he's promised completion of.]

[faceguy]

I could have more! Who knows what Draxum was up to.

[He doesn't doubt Donnie has a new list of projects built up, now that he's done with Leo's shell. It should be a good thing. He thinks it is. But still...]

Yeah, yeah, I'm not here to get in the way of your precious nerd work. I just... heard your broadcast, and I thought I'd... uh... see if you wanted to take a break, or something.

[He doesn't know how to say "I heard your broadcast and I'm worried", because that's never been his style. But it probably comes through in his tone.]

[purplexing]

...know what, fair. [Because you know, Draxum.] In which case I will have default superiority by familiarity.

[He shrugs, moving around the salvage with what he's gathered so he can set it down, tail swishing behind him.]

Already had one. [The broadcast, that was a break, right?]

[faceguy]

Even if there were more, you'd still be my favorite because no one else is as fun to bother.

[A true declaration. But yeah, he doesn't buy that.]

Uuuuh huh. I guess you're counting your speech to the convoy. [Leo huffs.] You still didn't pick a DJ name.

[purplexing]

[The exaggerated sigh is purely show, a faint smile slipping before he can hold it back.

Donnie goes over to another box he's designated for in-progress works, putting the parts there.]

Well, yeah. And before it.

[He rolls his eyes.]

Haven't thought about it yet.

[faceguy]

[He saw that smile! You love him, admit it!]

Fine, I'll give you a pass for today.

[Leo watches him at work for a moment longer, before sighing and moving to sit down.]

You're really okay? Not... thinking about anything in particular?

[purplexing]

[He does, but he will still happily throttle you.]

Cogito, ergo sum, "I think therefore I am." And there's never a lack of things to think of around here.

[Donnie sighs, turning one part over before dropping it into the box, resting an arm along the edge.]

...but I guess the answer's a little obvious given I just dumped all that out earlier.

[faceguy]

[Ah, there it is.]

You're worried one of us is going to forget again.

[He tilts his head, considering.]

Or... has the whole... bird-brain thing been getting worse?

[purplexing]

...both.

[Donnie frowns, still keeping his attention fixedly on the pieces in the box, mentally going over the things he'll need to do with them to prep for the various projects he has in mind.]

There's so much I'm sure I don't remember from the carnival, or they're fragmented because the information was processed different. ...and it seems like it's a lot harder to separate the bird-brain sometimes. Especially if I'm like, flying or doing the hunting thing.

[He'd tried to keep from flying too high and too far around here once he realized it, and at least so far it's helped.]

[faceguy]

[Leo wonders how worried he should be that Donnie is going to fly away from them and not come back. It would be almost impossible to find him, if that happened.

But more importantly, he may lose his brother another way; not physically, but mentally. He can tell that's what scares Donnie most.]

When you do go flying, do you at least feel like you have to come back here? Or do you just... want to leave us completely?

[He doesn't mean to sound scared, but he does, a little.]

[purplexing]

It's like...a rush. I know I'll have to come back down eventually but it's so hard to want to.

[Donnie finally just sits himself there on the floor, tail curling over his feet.]

Coming back isn't the problem, I think. It's more like I forget how to do...people things. Takes me a while to remember words, that kind of thing.

[faceguy]

[This is normally when Leo would say something like, "You? Forget how to talk?" But amazingly, he's learned a little tact.

Leo comes over and sits down by Donnie, though not getting into his space.]

So you get stuck in your bird feelings, and forget how to do normal stuff. That sounds... not fun.

[purplexing]

[THANKFULLY. Leo might've gotten smacked.]

Yeah... It helps when people start talking to me though. It pulls me out of it. That's why I thought... it'd be good letting other people know, you know? In case something happens where neither of us think to or are able to remember there's something to read or hear to remind us. And yeah, it'd be good for other people to prepare too, just in case.

[He lifts head, looking over at Leo then.]

...the whole moon situation might get worse. Those telescopes and everything on those farmhouses? The data they've been collecting predicts that a shattering of the moon is imminent. And with it, a transformation event unlike any previous occurrences.

[undyingcrow]

I'll take at least some credit for that. After all, I did introduce him to my favorite jazz club.

[Perhaps Ren already liked jazz before, but that's beside the point. He elevated Ren's tastes, clearly.]

Honestly, I have wondered about the more temporary changes. They seem to occur every month, though the circus seemed the most pervasive and diverse... Some of the changes stuck, but only for my secondary monster form.

Thus far, I'm still the only Drifter with two that I know of.

[faceguy]

Well, you know I'm always happy to talk! [Leo grins, though it's not quite as big as it could be. He's too busy thinking of what Donnie said about the moon. How it might get worse.]

How soon is imminent...?

[purplexing]

Oh! So it's your fault.

Secondary... How do you know it's not just...part of what you've been changing into?

I turned into a...cerberus...thing back there. I think it was just because of all the instability of whatever magic was going on there and forcing those changes on us though. Don't care to go through it again either way.

[purplexing]

[Donnie can't help but grin a bit in turn, because boy does he know that's true. But it's hard to keep smiling when they don't know what the moon might do next.

He shakes his head.]

Uncertain. "Imminent" by definition is "soon" so...

[His eyes track towards the ceiling of the Tank as though he can see the moon through it. It's still day out, which is why he hasn't gone to sit on the roof or something to stargaze, something he's been doing frequently ever since he'd started studying things through those telescopes.]

The frequency of the moon warps seems to be roughly monthly. I don't know if that's been an increase from how they'd used to be, and if they're any sure sign to watch for.

[faceguy]

Got it. So literally any day now.

[Great. That will do wonders for his anxiety!

He thinks about the moon warps he's experienced since he got here, especially before Donnie arrived. They were more or less monthly then, too, so he doesn't think there's been a noticeable increase. They've run into more pieces of the moon, or things that seem to simulate the moon warp, like his cage at the carnival, but that's different from the moon breaking apart.

Thinking of the cage again, Leo sighs.]

By the way, you haven't really been around me when I get warped all the way. [Mostly because he's been avoiding it. But if Donnie is right, this is probably necessary information.] I... kinda turn into a jerk, so... if it happens and I say something, well... sorry in advance.

[purplexing]

[He hates to be the bearer of bad news, but he can't not say anything about it either. It's part of what's prompted him to even say anything on the radios. He's scared, even if he won't outright say he is.]

All the way..?

[That's...true, Donnie thinks. He hadn't realized there was an 'all the way', much less what to expect of that.]

Sooo...worse than intentional jerk. [Because you can't lie Leo, there are times!!]

...I'll try to remember. But hey, maybe if you do say anything I won't really register it.

[Wow that was a horrible attempt at some levity. Donnie looks like he immediately regrets saying as much.]

[faceguy]

[Leo gives Donnie a Look, because he is never intentionally a jerk! ...Okay, maybe sometimes.

But yeah, that attempt at levity doesn't exactly make Leo feel better about it. At least Donnie realizes it.]

...I don't remember much from when it happens, either. [He grimaces.] I think, when it happened at the carnival, I... freaked Raph out.

[He sighs.] But hey, what else is new? [Okay, that joke didn't make him feel any better either.]